Rise Above the Perception Trap by Leigh Robert

Author:Leigh, Robert [Leigh, Robert]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2017-08-26T16:00:00+00:00

The Doubts Were Truth

After the baptism, the next few months flew by. My quest to serve Jehovah in the ministry was in full stride. I spoke to people at their homes, on the street and those at work. It was the way.

However, I was keeping up a pace my energy levels couldn’t sustain. Something began to change my zest for the ministry. I knew all about the cautions written in the scriptures of straying away, but those thoughts of doubt resurfaced again in my mind! I realised it wasn’t Satan. The thoughts were mine and not from another source, yet again I denied them and continued with the hectic schedule of full time work and pioneering.

One Sunday afternoon was pivotal. I ministered in Uppermill, Saddleworth. It was a bright and crisp autumn day. I was on my own and needed to finish my monthly target of hours. I walked through a public garden where a saw an old gentleman sat in front of a war memorial. I sat beside him on the bench and politely said, “Hello, sir”. I used the training to draw him in to the line of the teaching: A mention of the weather, a remark about how peaceful the day was, then, boom , something political. The gentleman conversed with me under the impression I was just a pleasant guy. He spoke about the time he served in the second world war and those he had lost. It was the perfect opportunity to cease the moment and say there is hope of resurrection. I pulled out a leaflet and asked if he would be interested in reading it. I mentioned the word Jehovah. His eyes dropped, and I saw his disappointment. In hindsight, I never should have invaded his space, and I wasn’t thinking about him after all. It was the programming. I had tricked him. I didn’t genuinely think of this man’s feelings. All I was concerned with was selling him something, selling him a story about the only purpose and hope was through Jehovah. This realisation hit me so hard. I could no longer ignore it. This was not me. What had happened dawned on me. My mind had been taken and controlled. I had been deceived and manipulated. I knew from that very moment that the Jehovah’s Witnesses teaching was just the same as any other religion, the same as the Church of England teaching in Junior School. It was not the truth but an idea . He took the leaflet, and I thanked and wished him a good day. Shamefully, I walked on my way. I loosened my tie and exhaled. A fear came over me as I headed back home to Mossley. I knew Jehovah was a lie, and Satan was their construction. The doubts I had that surfaced and I had accepted was the very first step to finding my true self. But what was I going to do? A huge and open expanse of the unknown dawned on and scared me deeply.

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